Broken City

Broken City, the latest offering from Albert Hughes is an unmitigated, muddled mess of a film. He tried to deliver a political thriller something akin to All The President's Men and he failed on just about every level. Because of that, Broken City gets half a bucket of Killer Korn.




To say I was reluctant to see Broken City is an understatement. The reasons have to deal with two people in particular and they are the director Albert Hughes and Mark Wahlberg. Why those two? Simple, first off Albert Hughes was one half of the team that brought you the wretched Mad Max wannabe film The Book of Eli with Denzel Washington. When that movie ended I seriously wanted my money back. It took everything I had not to hunt down the manager and demand a damn refund. The second reason has to do with someone who clearly has no acting talent to speak of. Mark Wahlberg would have a hard time acting as a mime if he stood still. In this movie, like all of his others he blesses you with two facial expressions, complete bewilderment or absolute anger, there is little to nothing in between those two emotions. The sad part about that is his character is a great role and were it in the hands of someone with some kind of screen charm, it would have been a far better movie.

(Marky) Mark Wahlberg was surround with a stellar cast, and I mean STELLAR. Russell Crowe plays the Mayor of New York as Nicholas Hostetler, Catherin Zeta-Jones plays his wife Cathleen, the amazingly talented Jeffery Wright plays Police Chief Carl Fairbanks, Barry Pepper plays Senator Jack Valliant who is running against Hostetler is a heating campaign for Hosteteler's seat. Rounding out the amazing cast is the extremely talented Michael Beach, Kyle Chandler, and the lovely Natalie Martinez, and Alona Tal. This cast is chock full of truly talented people who do their best to make this film just watchable, let alone understandable. Their efforts were in complete vain. This film made no sense from top to bottom.

Mark's character, Billy Taggart was once a cop but was involved in a shooting. He was cleared but the people wanted some justice so he was fired from the force, which rarely happens but whatever. Someone came forward with evidence that would send Taggart to jail but the Mayor himself intervenes and sits on the evidence, which again while I'm sure has happened before, rarely does. Seven years later Billy is now a private investigator which still allows him to utilizes his skills as a detective but he's a horrible debt collector so the pennies are tight. One day he gets summoned by Nicky the Mayor to find out with whom his wife is sleeping with for the lovely sum of fifty thousand dollars, twenty five up front and the rest on delivery of proof. Billy jumps at the money with no second guess, which as a cop you would think he would wonder why the Mayor would want him for this assignment, but nope. He takes the money, follows the Mayors wife, takes his pictures and turns them in even after Cathleen asks him not to.

The entire movie revolves around a 4 Billion dollar land grab for a housing project. The movie is a real estate land grab political thriller and those NEVER work. This talented cast has a hard time holding this horrible film together. There are unresolved story lines a plenty, unresolved matters of the heart, and questions regarding some characters interactions with each other. It's almost impossible for me to wonder how someone could have read this script and not voiced some concerns, unless the most important key elements of the story are on the editing room floor somewhere. The one thing I will say about Broken City is it has a great score. Oscar award winner Atticus Ross, along with Claudia Sarne, and Leopold Ross have together crafted a dark and tense score that's pretty much wasted on this film. The music however does have the ability to stand on it's own, which is a testament to how good it really is. I wish I could say the same about this movie, but I can't. Unless you are a diehard Mark Wahlberg fan (which I really don't understand) then you will enjoy Broken City. If you aren't, then I suggest you do not waste your time or your money. Skip this, see something else and I'll see you at the theater.    

Hansel & Gretel

Hansel & Gretel, the latest movie from director Tommy Wirkola is an interesting film. It's an intriguing take on the classic childhood fable of the two little children lost in the woods only to be found by a witch that lives in a house made of candy. This movie takes off where that fable ends, and it's done in a rather impressive way, therefore I give Hansel & Gretel two and a half buckets of Killer Korn.




Going into this movie I really thought it was going to suck. Seriously, after buying my ticket I thought "Welp, there goes $13.50 down the drain...let's go get some popcorn." Surprisingly though, Hansel & Gretel impressed me. I wasn't all that enthused by the cast when I first saw the trailer. Jeremy Renner playing Hansel and Gemma Arterton playing his sister did NOT excite me. Mainly because Gemma is from the UK and has a distinct accent, while Jeremy, her supposed brother is from wonderful Modesto, California. I wondered with a smile just how the producers and the director was going to work that little issue out. Come to find out Gemma is decent at hiding or masking her accent. She still sounds nothing like a California girl (I wish they all could be) but it's not as bad as one would imagine. Secondly, the story about two kids lost in the woods who kill a witch who lives in a house made of candy doesn't quite thrill, but I sat my butt in that seat and shoveled some killer korn in my mouth and watched. What I saw wasn't at all that bad.

The story starts off with or course,  Hansel & Gretel being left in the woods by their father. You have no idea why they are, and there father never returns for them like he said he would. They are on their own and since they are both tired and hungry, they wander the forest until the come upon a house made of candy. They knock but no one answers so they start to eat the candy, that's when the doors open and the witch inside plans to cook and eat them. Gretel fights back while Hansel is being fattened up for cooking. Needless to say, the siblings fight, they win, and they burn the witch alive. Fast forward to many years later, and now Hansel and his sister Gretel are with hunters. They go from town to town, rescuing the children that were taken and destroying the witch responsible and they are very successful at it.

They are called into this little town by the Mayor, played by Rainer Bock much to the chagrin of the sheriff, played by Peter Stormare. He wants to hunt down and kill the witches himself but he takes a backseat to the dynamic duo of witch slayers. They come into town just in the nick of time to save the lovely Mina, played by Pihla Viitala. She's about to be burned at the stake for being accused as a witch. What she is is actually the emotional core of the movie. The movie also stars Famke Jensen (of who I am a huge fan) who plays Muriel, the head witch. She and two cohorts are kidnapping children, 6 boys and 6 girls. Each kidnapped child is born on a different month in the year because according to witch lore, during a blood moon, if these children are sacrificed then witches can be unharmed by fire ever again. It would render them almost invincible.

Throughout the movie, the witches magic works on everyone BUT Hansel & Gretel which is why they are so brave in going after witches, you find out why as the movie tells of their childhood. I won't give any plot points away but I will say this, it is a very interesting story twist. It's one you can almost see coming but it's told in such a way that just...makes sense. Hansel & Gretel are also joined by their biggest fan on the hunt for Muriel, his name is Ben who's played by Thomas Mann. He's fresh off his turn in two teenage party movies, Project X and Fun Size and honestly, he feels out of place here. Now I saw the movie in 2D instead of 3D and I would recommend 2D because 3D looks like it would be super corny. Besides, a 3D ticket is more expensive and not really worth it. Not in this case anyway.

The films look is cheesy but you get pass that, the acting is a bit over the top but you can get pass that as well. The score by Atli Orvasson and overseen by Hans Zimmer, while boring most of the time does have its moments that really works well with the film. All in all, Hansel & Gretel isn't a bad film, and if it does any real recouping at the box office, you can look forward to a sequel. And maybe that's when they will fill in some of the gaping plot holes in this film. If you can overlook those, and you will, then Hansel & Gretel might just be worth your dollar and I'll see you at the theater.

Django Unchained

Django Unchained, the latest film by Quentin Tarantino, is yet another in a long line of movies by this man that deals in complete and utter fantasy. Is there an realism in this movie, yes of course. In its own way, it shows the atrocity that was physical slavery but that's where the reality ends. Everything else in this movie is such amazing bullshit that I am glad I didn't pay to see it. For that, Django Unchained gets a half a bucket of Killer Korn.





Last year, I saw a movie that dealt with fantasy in the midst of a real time historical figures life. That movie was Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer and that film was so bad, it was laughable. Django belongs alongside that movie. And while this movie didn't have any howler monkey type vampires, this movie was so truly ridiculous that I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Now honestly, I am NOT a Tarantino fan. My dislike for his so called talents started after Pulp Fiction and he put the nail in that coffin with Inglorious Basterds. As a filmmaker, he's a thief and a hack, and as a story teller he's sorely lacking so I really had no desire to see Django Unchained. To say I didn't get all excited when the trailer hit would be putting it mildly. My sphincter muscle didn't constrict at all and the movie didn't really register on my radar. There were other movies I was waiting for with more anticipation, like LUV. Why? Because I just figured it was going to be another sloppy film making effort by someone who should never have left his job working the movie video store. Then I saw the trailer and literally said out loud, "There's no way I'm seeing this shit."

It stars the Oscar award winner Jamie Foxx as the title character who was recently bought at a slave auction. He and four other slaves are making the long trek back to their new plantation when they get intercepted by Oscar award nominee Christoph Waltz who plays Dr. King Schultz, a dentist/bounty hunter. How the doc knows when and where Django and his party are going to be or where they just came from is a mystery that's never answered. Dr. Schultz is on the trail of the Brittle brothers but he has no idea what they look like. How he knows that Django knows what they look like is again, another mystery never answered. Dr. Schultz liberates Django and the other slaves and from their slavers and rides off with Django. He explains to Django what he does for a living, that he's not really a dentist, that like slavery he is in the flesh for money business, and how being a foreigner detests the very notion of slavery. Django reveals he has a wife and while he has no idea who owns her, he knows where she was sold into bondage.

After the demise of the Brittle brothers, Dr. Schultz proposes the two of them team up, continue collecting bounties and when the winter is over, they find Django's wife and free her. Django's wife, Broomhilda, played by the very talented Kerri Washington is the property of Calvin Candie, played by Leonardo DiCaprio and is working on his plantation known as Candyland. Dr. Schultz and Django meet up with Calvin in Mississippi and pretend to want to get into the Mandingo fighting business. During that meeting, Django meets the original Django, the man who played Django in the 1966 film of the same name, Franco Nero who plays Amerigo Vessepi, he's the man Jamie spells his name to, which I'm guessing is supposed to be a funny inside joke. Yes boys and girls, even the name of this movie is unoriginal. Just when Dr. Schultz and Calvin are about to work out a side deal for Broomhilda, Stephen the head house slave, played by Samuel L. Jackson explains what's really going on and then all hell ensues.

Django, who has supposedly never handled a gun before he met Dr. Schultz, becomes lethal with them during the winter the two men spend together. The shootout in Candyland is over the top ridiculously violent, and completely unnecessary, but since it's a Tarantino film, its accepted. Django takes on all of Candie's field hands until he runs out of bullets and gives up. He's sold to a mining company where while they are en route, he outwits his captors and heads back to Candyland for his wife. Now, is Django Unchained a good film? It depends on who you ask. If you're asking me, I'd say no. Django Unchained allows Quentin to indulge himself in using one of his favorite words repeatedly and getting a pass because, well the story takes place during slavery. The story, one of the most paper thin plots I've run across in some time. This movie supposedly shows what a man will go through to get his wife, and while that is admirable, it's not a good film. Quentin has learned no new tricks regarding film making, so this looks like everything else he's ever done. It's turned out to be one of his most profitable, and that's not surprising to me at all. People paid for a ticket out of pure curiosity, others are unwavering fans of this talentless hack of a filmmaker. I'm just glad I didn't pay to see it.

Django Unchained shows you nothing new, nor does it teach you anything you shouldn't already know about slavery, but just in case you were wondering, this movie takes place well before bounty hunting ever even existed in this country. Skip it and see something else if you haven't already seen it, and I'll see you at the theater.

LUV

Everyone wanted to make a big deal out of me not seeing Django Unchained. Little did they know I was waiting for another movie, a lesser known movie with an amazing Black cast. LUV, directed and co-written by Sheldon Candis is a film depicting a day in the life of two Black men, and while it is not amazing, it is special and for that I give it two and a half buckets of Killer Korn.





First thing I need to say about LUV is that I can relate to it in such a visceral way. It's a story about an uncle named Vincent, played by the magnetic Common takes his nephew for the day. The nephew, Woody is played by newcomer Michael Rainey Jr., he's a charming young actor with a very bright future. Woody pines for his absent mother while living with his grandmother played by the very talented Lonette McKee. The reason I say I can relate is because I had an uncle just like Vincent, who has returned home after serving eight years of a twenty year prison stint, and he is determined to turn his life around. He's got big plans, legal plans and his entire drive is to make those plans come true. While driving his nephew to school, the two have a conversation and Woody makes the mistake of telling his uncle something that wasn't true. Vincent, instead of dropping Woody off at school, decides to show him what it means to be a man, and off they go.

The movie stars a who's who of amazing Black actors. Dennis Haysbert plays Mr. Fish, Danny Glover plays Arthur, Charles S. Dutton plays Cofield, the beautiful Meagan Good plays Beverly, the amazing Russell Hornsby is Det. Pratt, and the equally talented Michael Kenneth Williams plays Det. Holloway. That is an amazing collection of talent for a director shooting just his second full length feature film. As much as I like Jamie Foxx, forget Django. Anyway, Vincent takes nephew Woody around Baltimore with him as he conducts his business but first he has to dress his nephew in something other than his school uniform, he wants to dress him as a businessman. The scene where Woody is being suited up is so touching, you can't help but smile.

Vincent then heads to the bank to see about a loan for his dream, and if you know anything about the magnificent show The Wire, you will recognize the loan officer. Vincent is told he needs a certain amount of money by Monday or the deal will fall through. The scene where Vincent decides what he needs to do is intense. You can see the wheels turning as he chews his gum and this is the point in the film where the phrase "the road to hell is paved with good intentions" comes to mind. Vincent needs the money to turn his life around, but he has to swim with the sharks in order to get it, and you can see that moment happen so vividly on Commons's face. He does his best to get the money without doing anything that will get him thrown back in jail or worse, get him and his nephew killed, but that's not an option, so Vincent jumps headlong into those shark infested waters and takes his nephew with him.

There are so many tense scenes in LUV, where dialogue is spoken with the eyes or the face. But you, the viewer don't have to try to discern what's being said, eventually it all plays out. Danger is everywhere though, and it's real. Like the encounter between Vincent and Little Baby, played menacingly by Hayward Armstrong. That scene is rife with tension and danger. Vincent doesn't flinch but Woody cowers, which brings out Vincents wrath. This movie shows you clearly how one mans definition of what it means to be a man, can be so twisted, so wrong. Vincent shows Woody so many things this eleven year old boy should not be taught how to do at his age. Scored with a tautness by Nuno Malo, this film crackles. Then ending was a bit far fetched, bordering on fantasy, but if you can look past the last two minutes of this movie, you'll definitely have something special. I recommend it and I'll see you at the theater.

The Central Park Five

The Central Park Five is a profound documentary on all levels. It was an astonishing look back on the city I love and call home, during a time when this city wasn't doing all the well. This movie may shock you, depending on who you are and where you come from. I give The Central Park Five three buckets of Killer Korn.




In New York City, back in the 80's, there was a chasm between it's residents. A deep one that in certain aspects, still hasn't been healed. It was the time of Koch and Cuomo, corrupt cops, overzealous investigators, ambitious district attorneys, and crack. With crack came an escalation in crime and violence the likes this city had never seen before though most of the violence was Black on Black. Young Black males killing each other over drugs and the money that followed. The city was crumbling down around Black people but was evolving and improving around whites. The stock market was making people rich seemingly overnight and legal money was flowing into the city as fast as illegal money was. Racial tension was high thanks to the likes of the subway vigilante Bernie Goetz, the incendiary Rev. Al Sharpton, the ridiculous Guardian Angels, and the clueless mayor, Ed Koch.

Thrown into all of this was the assault and rape of a white woman in the sacred part of the city known as Central Park. She was known as the Central Park Jogger and she was almost killed by her attacker. Shock and fear descended on the city and the people wanted justice immediately. The police, feeling the pressure of solving such a case, all the while having a handful of Black and brown teenagers in the Central Park precinct at the time for harassing pedestrians and other joggers, pressured and coerced those young men into admitting to a crime they had absolutely nothing to do with.

Those young men were Antron McCray, Yussef Salaam, Kevin Richardson, Raymond Santana, and Korey (Kharey) Wise. These five young men became the symbol for everything wrong with the city at the time. They were so vilified by the press, who was so quick to rush to judgement that even though their accounts of the crime didn't match, and the fact that none of them left any DNA at the crime scene, they were GUILTY! There was even a call to bring the death penalty back just for these boys and leading that charge was the complete and utter ignorance of Donald Trump. This case so split the city in two, divided racial lines so sharply that it was virtually Black against white. White people were outraged that five Black and brown boys pounced on this lovely white woman while she was out jogging in Central Park at 9pm at night. Black people shouted that if this woman had been found in Brooklyn, or the Bronx, no one would give a damn.

Co-directed by celebrated documentor Ken Burns, Sarah Burns, and David McMahon, The Central Park Five revisits a time in this city that I had all but forgotten about. It reopened that can of worms and re-awakened certain memories that I had either forgotten about or repressed. If you get the chance to see this movie, I HIGHLY recommend it, and if not then seek it out on DVD when it's available. You get to see just how the wheels of justice, when pressured, can turn against someone, ruin lives with no apology, recourse, or punishment. It may change your perspective on how people are dealt with by those that are sworn to serve and protect. Go see it, as fast as you can because it is worth seeing, and I'll see you at the theater.

Gangster Squad

Gangster Squad, the new film by Ruben Fleischer is a good bang for your buck. If you're looking for an action movie that requires little thought, then Gangster Squad delivers. If you were hoping for more than that, like I was, then you may be a tad disappointed. All in all though, I give Gangster Squad two buckets of Killer Korn.





I have never been much of a Sean Penn fan, yeah I said it. He seems to have always played the same guy in all his movies, so much so that I questioned if he was an actual actor (like I question Clive Owens) but when Sean did Harvey Milk so convincingly, I never questioned him again. In Gangster Squad, Sean impresses me again. In his portrayal of mobster Mickey Cohen, Sean Penn nails it, in my opinion. Without him, this film could have easily been a joke. Along for this ride is his costar from Milk, Josh Brolin who plays the head of the Gangster Squad Sgt. John O'Mara. He's tasked by Chief Parker, played by Nick Nolte, to go after Mickey by any and all means. O'Mara's pregnant wife Connie, played by Mireille Enos helps him pick his squad of cop thugs. Together they enlist the help of Sgt. Jerry Wooters, played by Ryan Gosling, Officer Max Kennard, played by Robert Patrick, Officer Navidad Ramirez, played by Micheal Pena, Officer Conway Keeler, played by Giovani Ribisi, and Officer Coleman Harris, played by the talented Anthony Mackie.

Those five men engage Mickey Cohen in a way he's never known before. Everyone thinks the officers are a new gang, moving in on Los Angeles and Cohen's territories, even the papers buy into it. The movie is supposed to be inspired by true events but since the "Gangster Squad" was off the books, no one knows if this is true or not because there is supposedly no paperwork on them. The movie is adapted from the book "Gangster Squad" written by Paul Lieberman, who co wrote the screenplay with Will Beall, and because it seems the dialogue is ripped straight out of every other gangster movie ever made, I'll pass on reading the book. With this cast you would think this would be a slam dunk but again, had it not been for Sean Penn who is the glue of this movie, it would have fallen apart. Mickey's "culture coach", Grace Faraday is played by the lovely Emma Stone, who of course while being involved with a gangster, falls in love with Sgt. Wooters. True or not, who's to say? Stupid move, definitely.

If this movie sounds like a complete rip off of the classic The Untouchables with Costner and Connery, that's because there are elements where The Untouchables impacts Squads story line in so many ways. If you've never seen The Untouchables, see that instead of this. Trust me, you won't be sorry. At least in that movie, people could shoot. Gangster Squad has some of the most inaccurate Tommy gun shooting I have ever seen. Now the Tommy gun was known to be notoriously inaccurate, but this was ridiculous. Now when I saw the first trailer for this movie, there was a scene that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up and I couldn't wait to see it on the big screen. The movie was supposed to hit theaters last summer, it was delayed for re shoots, then it was supposed to hit last fall but tragedy struck Aurora, Colorado and the movie was pushed back again and I knew why after seeing the movie.

That scene, the one that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up, was a moment where Mickey's henchmen shoot up a movie theater. They shoot through the movie screen as they try to kill O'Mara and the way it was done made me say "Nice". However, after Aurora, the trailer was altered and that scene was removed as it was in the movie. They had to go back and re shoot the entire third act of the movie because of the movie theater shooting in Aurora. The producers didn't want to seem insensitive and while I can't blame them, they removed what looked like the best scene of the movie, out of the movie. This movie was shot like it was filmed by a film school graduate. There was nothing artistic, graceful, stylized, or inspiring about the the way this movie was shot or directed. the two things this movie did have going for it was Sean Penn, and Steve Jablonsky's score. Usually known for his over the top sound, Steve toned things down considerably for this movie and it worked like a charm. Check it out, see for yourself and let me know if you think I'm write or wrong, and I'll see you at the theater. 

The Impossible

The Impossible, the film by Juan Antonio Bayona about a family caught in the massive tsunami that hit Thailand, is an amazing film. It's incredible on all fronts technical, and while it borders on the schmaltz emotionally, it's still very profound. I give The Impossible three buckets of Killer Korn.




Usually, when someone wants to describe something that's so big that they can't describe it with one word, they usually use "herculean", when it comes to them. I don't. I go with the more modest "Everest" description. If something is so seemingly huge and appears so daunting, I say it's Everest-like. I invoke the name of the highest peak in the world, in the hopes of giving something some serious perspective. While watching The Impossible, that phrase came to mind again, and again. Directed by J.A. Bayona, The Impossible is the telling of a true story of a family on vacation in Thailand when the tsunami hit their beachfront resort. Ewan McGregor plays Henry, the father. Naomi Watts plays Maria, the mother. Samuel Joslin plays Thomas, the middle brother, while Oaklee Pendergast plays Simon, the youngest brother. The real star of the show though is Tom Holland, he plays Lucas, the older brother. Quite simply, he is magnetic.


Henry, Maria and their three sons decide to go to Thailand for Christmas. They are a regular family, complete with all the stresses and worries of any other family. All those worries and stresses though are soon completely forgotten about when the tsunami hits. If you ever were curious about a tsunami, if you've done all the research on them then you know they are caused by an earthquake, volcanic eruption, or landslides or some other underwater disturbance large enough in the ocean to create a tidal wave. If, for some reason you were curious as to what it would be like to be in one, see this film. J.A. Bayona submerges you relentlessly underwater, with the cast as they fight for dear life to stay afloat. You will find yourself gripping the arm rests as you struggle along with Maria and Lucas.


Maria gets the worse of things and Lucas, the "brave" one admits to being scared, but he doggedly looks after his mother. Those two are swept away from the resort in what has to be one of the most amazing sequences ever. The special effects to recreate the tsunami is nothing short of incredible. It's violent, unforgiving, and unstoppable. With his mother losing a good amount of blood, Lucas heads them towards a tree to climb but they hear a baby crying. Lucas wants to ignore, admonishing his mother, telling her there is nothing they can do and they need to get to safety. Maria invokes his brothers names and Lucas snaps at her that they are dead. He tells her if another wave hits, they will die too, Maria, undeterred tells him if it's the last thing they do....


That's where this movie turns from good to amazing. Capturing the human spirit is done so perfectly by Bayona that I now what to see his other works. It's amazing, when things happen and people come into your life to save it, they do all they can to take care of you and to keep you alive, only to vanish in the end when they feel you are in good hands. There is that moment in this movie, and Lucas knows that "thank you" is just so inadequate, so small, and yet that is all he has to offer the men that get him and his mother to safety. There's heartbreak, despair, and death all over this movie. But there's also hope, love, and compassion in equal measure as well.


Now when you look out on the utter destruction and desolation that's left behind by the tsunami, when you see the teeming masses at the hospitals, you will see why I feel that someone finding anyone is Everest-like, and that's why the name of the movie is what it is. It just looks virtually impossible this family will ever be whole again, and yet...they are. Now how the family finds each other is what I feel is the movies weakest moment, but if it really happened that way, then who am I to say it should have been done differently? Scored lushly by Fernando Velazquez and shot beautifully by Oscar Faura, The Impossible was the perfect first film to see in 2013, it is unforgettable. Don't believe me, go see it for yourself and you decide. And I'll see you at the theater.